What Courage Feels Like

It’s taken me many years to really understand courage. It’s a tough concept, if you think about it. Not that I think I know it all, but I think I know enough at this stage of my life.

Sometimes, when I want to understand what something is, I first try to define what it is not. So, this is my take… Courage is not impulsiveness, ignorance, sorrowful, desperate, insecure, indecisive, etc. You get the idea. On the other hand, I feel that courage is the following: To not sell out on you despite the world whispering in your ear to be something else. To make sure you know who you are and what’s important to you, and what it is in life that makes it all go around. To be deliberate about choices. Now. Not tomorrow. To have fear, but to not make it your deciding factor, but just another one of the many factors, or to even make it your catalyst.

I read this quote by Anaïs Nin recently and since then it’s been swimming around my head like a shark looking for its next meal. Duh ruh… duh ruh duh ruh!

I want my life to expand, not shrink. Who doesn’t want a richer life? So, that means I must be courageous.

A case in example. I’ve always wanted to meet someone (of the partner-y type) to do life with. I’ve had a few hits and a few misses, as we all do. Now, after working really hard to filter many events and information (and non-events and non-information, ha!), I’m just getting back into the groove of me and my life, and having my emotional and mental energy returning. I’ve noticed that the friends and family I have are more than enough to satisfy my life partner(s) requirement. I have dreams that make me so excited, I can’t wait to wake up over weekends. This is an amazing position to be in.

The funny thing is, unexpectedly, I have met someone quite remarkable. You’ll never guess who it is! OK, maybe you can.

Courage for me now is this, to know that finally I am happy to choose just me. In the process and as a result I have chosen (for) many other things I’ve never thought possible. And against, of course. It’s about letting go to be able to take hold of other, new things and ideas, and even people. As the quote goes, “There will always be someone who criticises what you do, so do what you want to do and please at least yourself.”

Ain’t life and courage wild, scary and grande!

So, have courage, my friends. It’s never too late. Jamais!

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